Saturday, December 18, 2010

Take The Express Lane.

I find it really funny how people always wish each other "a safe trip" whenever they go on a long journey. I just find the idea of "hoping" or "wishing" someone to have a safe trip kind of, well it' doesn't really make sense. Unless of course you wish him a safe trip in your head. That would make it more like wishing. Saying it is kinda weird if you think about it. But then again, it's customary, it's pleasant to hear, and it does make you feel more secure so heck it. Have a safe trip.

Anyways, I will be out of town from 19th to 3rd January. Out of sync with the world for 2 weeks. Then back to reality and it's life back on the express lane.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

What's My World Coming To?

So I've had another dream about you. What's my world coming to???

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

When It's Really Time

It be nice if I could hold your hand as we shifted through the twisted journey to our A's.
With all the committments that i have to undertake next year, i'm not sure if i can give you what you truly deserve. I don't think I will be able to keep it going all the way. But is it too early to bury the worries? This wish i still my command.

And i wonder which one of us, is gonna state the obvious. And i wonder if you already know, but i gotta let you go. This ain't the way i planned and i think we all know i aint the great romantic but i know i'll regret this decision next year whenever i look into your eyes, but it's for my own good.

Life sucks.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

I've Got Bills To Pay

As we enter into the final month of a rather eventful year filled with bad choices and right decisions, I think it's been a pretty bad one on the whole...so far. There's still 31 days to make it right.

So my results have been prettty good, i exceeded my own expectations. 3As 1B and a D for GP. Gotta work a little harder on that.

So hockey's been rather fun. Although i have to say that certain people inside have effectively made it a little far off from perfect. I don't have to mention any names for people to know who it is.

While i don't think i have made any new friends whom i can really trust and rely on, i think i still got 31 days to do that. I feel that i've neglected true friendships for more acquaintances. I realised, it's so much better to have a smaller group of close friends than a larger group of "just friends". But this year, i dont think i've made new friendships that i can truly treasure. I'm definitely trying to build upon some of them now, strengthen them and keep them (:

I shall take my leave for tonight.  

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

End of an Era? Maybe...(Part 2)

to begin where i left off in the previous previous post:

PW was a real roller coaster ride. It began with the PI, where i started of with something a little out of the scope of the subject, blame me for trying to hard ehh (it was something to do with legalization of cannabis in Netherlands applied to alcoholism in youths in Singapore). So i switched to the environment, a project called RecycleKids, getting kids to recycle and rewarding them for it, nothing novel here anyway, but did it anyways. Although at the time, i thought it was the best idea ever (I really don't know how i came to that conclusion).

Then came the choosing of our groups. Although I have to say that I did enjoy working with MOST of you, I would be lying if i said that I liked all my members. Given a chance to choose again, the choices would definitely be different. We set off on a rather unsteady platform, with the idea of RecycleKids becoming less novel in each subsequent meeting until at one point I realised that it just had to go. So let's fastforward past the EoM parts (which to me, was rather easy).

We had to switch the idea from Kids to Housewives as suggested by Gerrard Yee the HoD of PW. He said every group was doing something for kids, and said housewives was a novel and effective target for environmentalism. We all agreed. So, with this new found inspiration and the motivation that came along with a new idea and full of promises, i got the group to come to my house for a meeting to develop this idea further and put it out on paper. Well of course Brandon didn't come. It was expected as usual. He never really cared about PW, his inputs were childlike and near-sighted. He was late for all the meetings and was also half-hearted in them. He was always texting during meetings, yet he never answered any of my calls nor replied my texts. PW made me hate him for who he was. Even though i tried to bury the hatched with him on countless occastions, he never failed to make that hate resurface. So much so that right now, when i think of him or see him, i feel a hatred so great i think of really draconian measures that i would like to impose against him.

Back to my point, that meeting at my house failed and i got more pissed off because of the lack of input from my group members. Desperate for help, i sought help from my dad, and he gave me a rather effective idea that would help the problem of the environment. I took it, developed it into what i like to call, TheGreenHood Project.

I made it a point from then to involve my members as much as possible and using them for their strengths and not their weaknesses. Of course this didn't work for Brandon. So Yong Khuang was my right-hand man, always there, reliable and responsible and helping me with everything I did, stayed up till late with me to complete the things i needed help in. Then there was Charissa, always making the meetings really fun and enjoyable with her rather innocent and sometimes crude remarks about Brandon and things in general. I found out at some point while working on the new idea that she was actually quite good with ideas. Then finally, Kelyn, i don't know what my group would do without her. Her illustrations and apt for design gave my group the edge over the rest.

The PW week gave me a very good insight into each of my group members character and strengths. I really enjoyed the time working with them on the final stages of the project during the PW Week and dates running up to it. The video was real fun to produce with you all (except Brandon, who wasn't there at all).

While the idea was mostly mine and most of the report was mostly my work, i'd have to say that i would not have been able to do it without your help and inputs. Kelyn for her drawings and creativity. Yong Khuang for his reliability in helping me all the time with things i needed more hands with. Charissa for helping me when i came to a dead end with my ideas. Brandon for...(well i guess, there's nothing that he did. Honestly, i tried to think of something, but nothing came out)

It's definitely an end to something that has eclipsed our JC 1 lives, for me at least. I hope that i do get that A i wanted. And i hope that my group will all get an A. Except Brandon, you honestly don't deserve it.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

If only it were that easy...

Sunday, November 14, 2010

End of an Era? Maybe...

So i thought i'd post about PW. I mean to be honest, it's probably the best subject of all the subjects we take in the entire course of the Singapore education system. It's the only useful subject that actually teaches you something about street smarts. It's the only subject that allows you to discern completely, those who have the street smarts and those who don't. You can tell the difference between those who study so hard for the paper qualifications but lack the capability and ability to succeed in life because what they learn through pure memorizing and lack of inspiration completely hinders them. You can tell two people who get straight As apart with PW.

But there's always a catch isn't there. There are so many loopholes and lame regulations in the subject itself; the way it's carried out and all. It makes it the stupidest subject yet again. So we have come to the end of it all. I must say it's been an experience, not the best i have to say, but definitely one worth remembering.

To be continued...

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Pins and Needles

Even though i know what i'm looking for, she's got a brick wall behind her door. I'd travel time to confess to her, but i'm afraid she'd shoot the messenger. Think again, is the wall really there? I think i've found the flower in the field of weeds, been searching until my hands bleed but does this flower belong to me?

Only time will tell, but someone's gotta take the first step. There are people who say that it's now or never, but i think that that's utter nonsense. But then again, i know nothing about this game i play and she's the referee isn't she?

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

in-DECISIVE?

i should really make up my mind. But is it really that bad? Hmm, but she really does seem like the one. I mean if the flame is still burning after almost 3 years, it means something right. It could. I hope it does.

Friday, October 8, 2010

This Too Shall Pass

Alright. Promos are over. As much as it may sound ironic, i'm bored. It's kinda weird, because when you're mugging from promos, you think of all the things you want to do after that, but it always comes back to this - being bored, and wanting to do those things but having no idea or energy to do them.

It's really fast how it seems like we've just started JC1 but yet we're already closing in on the last lap for the year. I really wonder how i'll do for the promos. I mean, i've got high hopes. If i could i would do a H3. No doubt. Getting excited for A Divs next year, gotta start training! Can't wait for training to start.

Had a really fun class outing after promos ended. We watched Devil, had lunch at Cafe Cartel, then went to pool and stoned alot.

In other things, thinking of forming another band with like "new directions" haha if you'd like to use glee terminology. I wanna play like more punk and alternative stuff. Bands like Sum 41, Green Day, Ok Go, AC/DC, Red Hot Chili Peppers have influenced me alot and i really wanna play that kind of music. Right now, the current band doesn't like those kind of songs, and it sucks alot to not be able to play the songs that you really love and like the band that you always wanted to play. It's been like my fantasy to play Basket Case, Motivation, Fat Lip, Back In Black stuff. Let's see how it goes, you know JC life gives no room for these kind of things if you want to do well, it's like one or the other. I guess that's why Singapore doesn't produce alot of talent eh...cuz many people see academics as the only way to be successful in Singapore, and with that mentality it will always be that way in reality. It's a catch-22 situation. Oh well.

PW Week, CL A Levels. I guess the fun starts and stops almost easily haha. Anyways excited in some ways to get PW done well.

Anyways really really hope i can take a H3, hope my Econs can get an A. But that remains to be seen...

I guess this is it for now?

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

When It's Time

I never thought i'd feel this way.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

I've been the greatest bitch I've seen

I don't know why i do it, and it's certainly not to make myself look good in front of others. You know, it might, at one point, but it was subconsciously.

I kinda realised it now, and i'm quite sure that if someone didn't tell me about it, i'd have carried on oblivious to the hurt i've been causing. I never thought i'd become like this, and i hate myself now. I can't believe it did all those things. But i did and i want to apologize to all of you.

Sorry Jerald, Joel, Adam, Arvind, Josiah, Shaun, for all the wrongs i've been doing lately. I hope you will forgive me, and after actually witnessing what i've done, if i were you, i don't think i would have forgiven myself. I've been a really bad friend.


Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Let Me Decide

I think it's about time. The government should stop treating us like brainless immature people. We are mature enough to discern these things ourselves and we can and should be able to decide what we want to see and hear.




spread the video!

Saturday, July 10, 2010

lean on me brother.

Sometimes in our lives, we all have pain, we all have sorrow.
But if we are wise, we know that there's always tomorrow.
Lean on me,
when you're not strong and I'll be your friend.
I'll help you carry on,
For it won't be long 'til I'm gonna need somebody
to lean on.


You just call on me brother when you need a hand.
We all need somebody to lean on.
I just might have a problem that you'll understand.
We all need somebody to lean on.

If there is a load you have to bear
That you can't carry
I'm right up the road
I'll share your load

(: we are all in this together aren't we? yeah we are.



Monday, July 5, 2010

this time, it'll be different.

well, been a long time already eh?

I figured. Common tests are over, i flunked 2 papers. But i got over that already. And there's always something to learn from it ain't there? I have my target for the year. Still remember the PROCESSES to reach that Goal. Process skils? hahahaha good times.

I'm going to keep my target of this blog. But i'm gonna do what it takes. Discipline.
Committment. Perseverance.

and Zong, if you're reading this in a few weeks time, and things arent going as planned. Remember what you want to achieve yeah? It aint gonna come easy. But the end of the journey will be a good one.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

all there is is a feeling.

I keep getting that feeling, it surrounds me more than ever before, is this it?
I should hope not, because i dare not.

Monday, May 24, 2010

the War of My Life

I should not be running
I should not be scared
I will be waiting and well prepared.

I've got a hammer
And a heart of glass
But I Don't know right now
which wall to smash.

If fear hasn't killed me yet
Then nothing will...

I'm in the war of my life
I'm at the core of my life
Got no choice but to fight till it's done
So Fight on, fight on everyone, fight on
I won't give up, I won't run.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Surrender, I will never have the nerve to ask

Even though I know what I'm lookin' for,
She's got a brick wall behind her door.
I'd travel time and confess to her,
But I'm afraid she'd shoot the messenger.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Don't Think Too Much

Sometimes thinking too much can be a little overwhelming. Sometimes, it does more evil than good, and sometimes vice versa.

ECONS, CHEM, PHY, GP, CL, PW, MATH. TEST, TEST, TEST, TEST, TEST.

At times i feel like dropping my 4H2 Combi.

and sometimes, going all the way without much thought can be a good thing. Can it? I should just tell myself, it ain't any different on the other side. Is it?

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Scattered.

It’s been a really long time. Things have changed. Even I have. There are days i don’t know what my goal is, looking forward to the end of the day isn’t exactly a good one. Sure i have set goals, but i can’t seem to believe that i have continue at this pace for 2 years.

Friends. I think i’m trying to take too much at one time. I never really realised it, but certain friendships have grown stronger, and others remain stagnant.

Things have changed. Like the wind just blew all the leaves away, scattered, confused and just apart.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Silence Me

I don't know why it's happening, but i've been getting quite frustrated trying to organize a class gathering on tuesday. I don't know if its because of the sucky replies (which i cant really blame anyone cuz its CNY) or the fact that i want to bond with my OG more cuz i been panging them. And i really feel bad. So its like i'm trying to organize 2 gatherings and part of me wants both to happen soon so its making me uptight for no reason. And the fact that the Non SAJC 4sa people can make it doesnt make things better at all. So now it's like a 4sa gathering with no purpose cuz its a SAJC gathering in other sense.

Ok so i just wanted to get that out of my system.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

A New Beginning!

Alright, so I'm in SAJC. In the end I didn't put VJC as 1st choice, there are implications, good and bad so i'll settle with SAJC. Love the culture over here. It's quite awesome. Love my OG!! Haha everyone there is super ON! Gotta hang out more with them! MUST BOND :D haha.

So orientation's over. Had problems deciding my CCA. Well i think i still do. But i wanna commit to playing hockey! haha gotta get that Team SAJC t shirt! LOL. Anyways hope to make the team this year! And higher expectations after that!

Me Russ Jk Jerald and Bart and Wei Li and Bob posted to same CG. Taking 4H2 BCME. It's already 2nd day of lectures and i'm starting to feel lost! I guess this is where reading up and good time management come in.

MSAs already coming up around the corner! Gotta revise Amaths topics for Math. DIE.
Just read Econs notes. haha It's interesting and stuff but i think i'm handling J1 in very bad mentality. I gotta loosen up a bit. I worry so much on falling behind my peers that its not doing me and good at all. Gotta stop doing that.

Anyways more updates soon! Miss all the babes that are not in SAJC. :'( Hope everyone can meet up on Friday!

Monday, January 11, 2010

We Will Always Be That Band of Brothers

Just wanna post some stuff, before results are released tomorrow. Feeling really nostalgic/emo/sad/happy. Just an array of emotions. You could say I'm overwhelmed even before the results are out. You could say that its because of well, how lucky i am to have been with the company of such great friends. In fact great would be an insult, an understatement and would do no justification to just how much they've made a difference to my life.

There's so much that's left unsaid, and i really think i gotta say them soon, Stuff of thanks, appreciation and just assurance and just personal stuff you know. haha. I mean i never felt this way about such friends, you guys are like brothers to me.

The fact that we may not be in the same class, or even the same school makes me sad. The fact that a possiblity exists that we may fall out over the next few year just encases me in a feeling of...i dont know how to describe man. DIE.

How time flies so fast... I wanna just note to myself tomorrow, that whatever happens (because i'm getting this feeling that i might not reach my goal) tomorrow, I will quickly get over it and move on with life, results aren't everything and besides, i have all of you guys.

Haha i have a sudden interest in taking Journalism in Mass Communication in Ngee Ann. Lol. It's something i can actually see myself doing. Haha but my parents want me to go JC.

Anyways you should be hearing from me soon. In my next post most probably later today. Just wanted to end off with a song that holds a lot of meaning with me.



Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)

Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road
Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go
So make the best of this test and don't ask why
It's not a question but a lesson learnt in time

It's something unpredictable, but in the end its right
i hope you had the time of your life.

So take the photographs and still frames in your mind,
hang it on a shelf of good health and good time
Tattoos and memories and dead skin on trial,
for what it's worth, it was worth all the while

It's something unpredictable, but in the end its right
i hope you had the time of your life.

Remember how i said i havent though of a resolution for the new year? Well here it is.

-I hope we will remain close friends forever. If not Best.
-Stay foccused in JC and pass A Lvl Chinese. :D

We Band of brothers forever. <3

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Can't Stop

Ok, this is long overdue heh. 2010 is already here. i still find it hard to come to grips with the fact that in a week, we will all found out how we did for the O's. I haven't really made any new year's resolutions. I will probably make them soon haha.

Just had a bbq yesterday. Then went futsal after that at about 11. and cycled into the night with Yau, Adam, Mervin, Solo, Bart and Clayton. Cycled from my house to mcdonald's then we cycled from there to changi village and back home. Covered almost 30+km and cycled for almost 7 hours. Ass still hurts.

The holidays are soon ending... i think its safe to say, JC will start late Jan, early Feb so still got some time to think about things and sort random stuff that's been hanging for a long time. Anyways, Arvind keeps disturbing me in a way...lol about results and all. Getting more nervous and my drifts and thoughts enter my head. Dreaming of things that make my mind go crazy, small things like: "what would happen after this?" "what if i don't get 6pts" "if i do, what now?" "if i don't what then?" "what about all my friends?". The list is endless.

Someone take my hand and show me the way.

Goodbye to you my trusted friend
We've known each other since we were nine or ten
Together we've climbed hills and trees
Learned of love and ABC's
Skinned our hearts and skinned our knees

Goodbye my friend it's hard to die
When all the birds are singing in the sky
Now that spring is in the air
Pretty girls are everywhere
Think of me and I'll be there

We had joy we had fun we had seasons in the sun
But the joy and the fun, would it be forever gone?

lol i added in the last line. seems just about right.