When One Door Closes, Another One Opens

It's been more than six years since I first started this blog. So long, I don't even remember why I started one in the first place. I was 13, I'm pretty sure the reasons would be those I'd find pretty amusing now. So much has happened in the past 6 years.

I've changed so much, but that's normal. Everyone has changed. I feel that if i were to continue blogging, it should be somewhere different. I don't want to dilute the identity of this blog that I would call young child-like innocence haha. As we all grow up, we change, we mature, and i think that future posts would be more reflective and take on a much different tone. What that tone would be remains to be seen. Coming of age if you will.

It has been really fun rambling and sharing this blog with you guys, but I think it's time I end this and open a new chapter in my life. 

Off Balance?

I somehow feel like so much has changed. I feel like I'm changing, growing into a different person. Even the word growing seems like its the wrong word to use. I feel different, my mindset has changed, I talk differently, or at least i think i do. Is this a good or bad thing? i don't know. Maybe i think I'm becoming cooler now, hanging with different people, doing different things, trying to act over my age?

My friend had a theory that he told me a few weeks back, and the more I think about it, the more i think it's totally true. He said that the people you hang around with, shape the way you think, the way you act and affect your priorities. So being placed in the company of different people constantly will have an adverse influence on who you are. I'm not too sure if adverse is the right word. Unless I'm a person with little influence over myself, then maybe he's right. But then again, i always thought i was a person who didn't care what others thought and stuck to my own beliefs.

I feel like the past few months have been very revealing of who i am as a person. Not just in character but the traits deep down inside. You could say I'm at a crossroad. Thrown off balance.

Is this peculiar for me at this stage? Or is this what they call growing up?

I think I blog when I'm nervous

I think I blog when i'm realy nervous or entering a new stage of life. Heh. So BMT was a breeze (looking back that is...). There were tough times, but i realised it's always in your mind. Sure it's tough but the physical can be overcome as long as your mind really pushes you. 24km route march was a killer, not physically as you would think but it was a mentally tormenting thing. It fucks with your mind haha.

So I got into OCS which was what i was aiming for when i was in BMT. But now that the day has come to join as an officer cadet, i'm getting nervous and a little afraid. I always told myself that this would be really good training, and i'm sure it would be haha but its 38 weeks of hell fun. that's the spirit.

I'm sure looking back i would say OCS was fun  haha but let's not get ahead of myself. So before i leave again, i must tell myself that i should take everything in a positive stride. Get fuck get fuck lo! Just suck thumb and carry on.

Gonna Kick Them Till I Need New Shoes

So the plan in my head was to record how each A lvl paper went, obviously it failed hahaha. It's been 2 months already. Can't say i'm didnt enjoy how i spent it, i feel like i did give each group of people in my life fair share of my time. (: Enjoyed hanging out with my JC class and i hope we can have more of such gatherings. As for my sec 4 class, i think its safe to say that a sorta like a clique has formed whereby, i dont actually bother about the rest of the class, but these select few(okay not that few) of friends.

A new chapter of my life begins in 2 days, intrigued and nervous at the same time. I have no idea how friendships will progress from then on and life is gonna be really different! i mean, think about having only weekends off!
got so much to do too:
1) Learn my Driving
2) SAT1!
3) Apply UNI

and just catching up with friends if time allows (it better!)

SO NS, you have finally caught up with me, or more like i've failed to run from you, gonna be positive about it and not depressed or sulkish. gonna take it in my stride. After all, when everyone goes through the same shit, it really ain't shit anymore haha.